Innocence
by See Jane Write
Summary: Alex's memory of her childhood experiences that led her to know she wanted to work on SVU cases.
1. Chapter 1

Innocence

Summary: Alex's memory of her childhood experiences that led her to know she wanted to work on SVU cases.

Author's Note: Slight AU. Age differences are mostly accurate, but a couple are off. Ages and birthdays based on those of the actors/actresses unless it was mentioned in the show (i.e. Casey). The time is based off of when Stephanie March would be seven, since this is an Alex-centric story.

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April 1983

There were a lot of things that Alex Cabot could understand. She was seven years old after all. She was in second grade at an elite private school that her father paid for her to attend. She was already taking third grade level math courses. She could understand anything relating to school. She knew to look both ways before she crossed the street. She knew not to go to certain stores unless her mother or some other trusted adult was with her.

What she could not understand was divorce. Why was her mother moving out of her father's house? Why did Alex have to go with her? Why did she have to say good-bye to her nanny? Why did her mother's "friend" keep coming over for dinner now that the two of them had moved? Why did he always want to make her a grown-up even if she did not like it? She did not understand it. She was not entirely sure if she liked any bit of it.

She liked her neighborhood. At least, her mother told her that she would like it. The yard was not as big as the one at her father's house was. However, her mother assured her that there were other children Alex's age living on the street. Alex had watched them from her bedroom window a couple of times. They were mostly boys, but there was one little girl. Alex did not know if the girl would like her though. All the times that Alex saw her, she was playing baseball in the street with the boys.

Then one day, about a month after Alex had moved in, she heard a knocking at her front door. She looked up from the kitchen table where she was dutifully doing her homework. Multiplication. She understood it easily. She placed her pencil down on top of her ditto and then joined her mother at the door. Her mother opened the door.

Standing on the doorstep were the children that Alex had been watching. There were six boys and the one girl. Most of the boys looked alike. Like the girl, they all had pale skin, freckles, and red hair. All of the children were wearing slightly messy clothes. The girl had her long red hair pulled back into a ponytail. The ends of her ponytail dangled near her waist. "Do you want to play with us?" the girl asked finally. "We're playin' Tag, and my brother Dave is it."

Alex took one look at them before she turned her head to look up at her mother. They looked like nice kids. She had watched them play Tag before, and it looked like fun. It definitely felt nice that she was finally included. "Can I?" she asked excitedly.

Stephanie Chase, the former Mrs. Richard Cabot II, took one look at her daughter and one look at the children. She looked around the rest of the street. There was an older child, a teenager it looked like, sitting on the porch in front of one of the houses. She assumed it was the babysitter. She exhaled deeply. Certainly her Alexandra would not be playing too terribly long. She was only within the couple houses in front of theirs. Someone would be watching them at all times. Plus, she wanted her daughter to be able to make some new friends for once. "Ok," she finally agreed. Before Alex could scurry off to play, her mother called her back. "But Alexandra," she said.

"Yes, Mommy?" Alex asked as she turned around.

"Change out of your school uniform first," her mother told her. "There are some play clothes in your dresser."

"Woah," one of the boys exclaimed as he caught a look at Alex's blue plaid jumper and white button down shirt. "You wear that to school!" It was more of an exclamation of shock than a question.

Alex simply nodded before she scampered upstairs to change. Within a few minutes, she was back downstairs and joining the other children.

"I'm Casey," the girl said as she stuck out her hand for Alex to shake. "And those are my brothers Dave, Tommy, Chris, and Greg," she added. Each of her brothers made some sort of weird gesture as Casey called their names. "And those are Billy and Bobby," Casey finished as she pointed to the other two boys. "They're nice."

Alex smiled at each of them. They obviously all knew each other. Most of them were related. She did not know how long it would take her to know all of these people, but she wanted to try. So far, she could only remember that the girl was Casey and the oldest boy was Dave. "I'm Alex," she introduced herself.

"Cool," one of the non-redheaded boys said. "So, we're playing Tag, and Dave over there is it. Basically, you just have to run away and don't let him touch you."

"Touch me where?" Alex asked curiously. She knew some places that people were not supposed to touch her. Her mother's friend Henry said some places were special. Only special people could touch them. He was one of those special people. Even though Alex did not like it when he touched her, she did not complain. He had told her it was a grown-up thing. She wanted to be grown-up, didn't she? Alex had said that she did. Henry said he would teach her, but she had to promise not to tell her mother. Alex had agreed.

The boy shrugged. "Anywhere. If he touches you, you're it." He pointed over at the older teenaged girl sitting on the porch. "And that's Eames. We don't know her first name. She's _fourteen_! Where she's sitting is base, so that's where you go if you get tired of running or you need water or juice."

"Or if you skin your knee," Casey added as she pointed at one of her band-aids on her left knee.

Alex nodded. This made sense. Even if she did not know who all of the children were, she understood how to play the game. One of Casey's brothers said it was time to start, so Alex started running. She lost track of Casey for a second. As she ran, she heard someone whispering to her. She turned around and realized it was Casey.

"Come here," Casey called. "I know a great hiding place so that the boys can't tag us," she said excitedly. As she scurried off with Alex, she smiled. "I like you," she said clearly. "I think you're nice."

Alex smiled back at Casey. "I think you're nice, too," she told Casey. "I'm seven," she added. "How old are you?"

"I'm almost seven!" Casey said excitedly. "My birthday month is in September."

"Oh," Alex said. "Well, in that case, I'm almost eight."

Casey frowned. "When's your birthday month?"

"July," Alex answered. She then followed Casey behind a couple of trees. That was Casey's great hiding spot. Alex smiled. She and Casey eventually moved so that they were sitting between two bushes. They were still out of sight. They remained there for the next forty some minutes and just talked. It was nice. They realized they liked a lot of the same things.

"ALEXANDRA!" came a loud voice. Alex jumped up as she instantly recognized it as Henry's. She did not like that voice.

"I gotta go," she said in a rushed voice. "Bye!" She quickly got out of the bushes and rushed back towards her house. "I'm sorry," she said in a meek and frightened voice.

"What do you think you were doing?" Henry yelled down at her. "I had no idea where you were. Your mother said you were playing, but I didn't see you out there." He spanked her hard before sending her up to her room to think about what she had done.

Tears filled in Alex's eyes as she obeyed him. Her mother did not hit her, but Henry said he was special. He said her mother was just too afraid to hit her, but he was not. It was his way of making sure Alex was a good girl. Strangely enough, her mother was never around when he hit her. She thought she heard him say that her mother went to get a couple things from the grocery store for dinner.

Alex waited in her room until it was time for dinner. She was silent all during dinner except to ask if she could be excused when she was finished. She went upstairs and changed into her clothes. She brushed her teeth and got ready for bed.

After she had been asleep for a couple hours, her bedroom door opened. In walked Henry. Alex knew what this meant. She pretended to be asleep, but she felt everything that he was doing. He slipped his hand under her nightgown and started rubbing her upper chest. There was nothing there, but he enjoyed it just the same. After about twenty minutes of rubbing it, he removed his hand. He grabbed her nightgown from the top and started kissing her upper chest. He did that only for five minutes before he left.

Once Alex heard him close the front door to her house, she started crying. It was silent, but she cried herself to sleep just like she had the previous night. Just like she would do the next night.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: I do apologize since this is short, but I can't out this with the next chapter. Although, more SVU characters are coming in, which I find exciting. Yay...Sigh.

Chapter Two

Over the summer, Alex had grown closer to Casey. The two of them did practically everything together. Alex's mother had taken them to the movies a couple of times. Mrs. Novak would take them to the park or bowling. Or, they would simply play Tag or Hide and Seek on the street between their houses with Casey's brothers. Casey's oldest brother had even gotten Alex interested in baseball, and she played that with them a couple times.

Once the school year started, the two remained close. They refused to let the grade and school difference break up their friendship. Provided that they had each finished their homework, their mothers let them play together. Most of the time Alex would go over to Casey's because she was afraid of being home alone with her mother's boyfriend.

She remembered the day it finally changed. At first, she was confused. It was well into night, but she did not remember Henry coming into her room. Then the door violently burst open. Alex closed her eyes tightly, but she did not hear Henry's voice. Instead, she heard her mother's. "Alexandra, get your coat on," she instructed. "And your shoes."

Alex knew she should not mess around. Her mother was serious. Alex quickly put her pink sneakers on along with her matching pink coat. Both were a gift from her father. "What's happening?" she asked as she walked over to her mother.

"Get your backpack," her mother instructed. "I've already got your uniform."

Alex quickly obeyed and before she knew it, her mother was dragging her down the stairs and out the front door. Instead of getting in their car, the pair went over to Casey's house. Alex's mother frantically knocked on the door.

"Diane, thank goodness," Alex's mother stated once Mrs. Novak answered the door.

"Steph, what is it?" Mrs. Novak asked as she quickly let Alex and her mother inside. Alex did not understand much of the conversation. She knew it had something to do with Henry. They mentioned his name a couple of times. Something about rape was mentioned, but Alex did not know what that meant. The only thing she understood was her mother asking if the two of them could stay with the Novaks.

Casey appeared on the top of the stairwell. "Mommy, what's happening?" she asked. She had a small teddy bear clutched underneath her arm. She rubbed one eye with her free hand as she started walking down the stairs. "Is it time for school already? It's dark outside," she pointed out.

"No," Mrs. Novak told her daughter. "Honey, why don't you show Alex to your room and grab a sleeping bag from Dave's room." It was not a question.

"A sleepover!" Casey exclaimed. "On a school night! Cool!" She scampered upstairs and waved her arm in a signal for Alex to follow. Alex took a look at her mother before following after her friend.

Diane Novak turned to Stephanie. "Do you think he hurt Alex?" she asked as both mothers saw their daughters disappear down the upstairs corridor.

"Without a doubt," Stephanie confirmed.


End file.
